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Just Pick It Up

In October 2019, Drake finally convinced me to let him set up an 8ft x 8ft weightlifting platform in our basement. He had asked me this a few times, but I was hesitant. (Admittedly, I'm a tad controlling when it comes to changes to the

Gus on the new platform

house). So, we made a deal; if he went to the gym consistently for several months, putting in a home gym would be worth it. The platform is solid proof of his consistency. It is made out of 2 layers of plywood topped with rubber matting and a slab of pine. (We had to cut the plywood into 2ft x 8ft chunks in order to get it into the basement.) Drake bought a squat rack, barbell, bench and plates to put on top of it.


While I dabbled a little bit in weightlifting, it wasn’t until March 2020 that I started lifting consistently 2-3 times per week. I wanted to become more intentional about my fitness.

Our platform, squat rack, and dip station

Given that he had been lifting for several months (and I wasn't really interested in doing my own research), I relied heavily on Drake to plan my workouts, teach me proper form, and supervise me during lifts. He got me set up with a workout tracking app and programmed it for me. I would like to take a moment to acknowledge all the effort and research he did that I shamelessly took advantage of. For months, he acted as both my husband and physical trainer.


My goal was to lift weights 3x per week. Pandemic life made this goal fairly easy to manage since we weren't allowed to go anywhere or do anything and going to the gym meant walking down the stairs to my basement. Over time, I started to feel comfortable working out at home by myself without Drake watching. My personal motto was "just pick it up." I'd repeat this to myself over and over, especially on the days that I didn't feel like working out. And I would, I'd pick it up and then set it down. Again and again and again. Eventually, it started to become part of my normal routine. I tracked my workouts in my habit tracker bullet journal and started to plan my weeks strategically in order to get my workouts in. It was really motivating to see my strength increase and become more confident with the exercises. When I first started lifting, I couldn't lift the barbell up onto the rack for squats, Drake had to do it for me. Now I do it myself, easily!


In January 2022, Drake saw an Instagram post from a local personal trainer, @AndrewCoatesFitness advertising a weightlifting program for women that he was beta testing along with @BaileyLaufit. They were looking for intermediate female lifters to test a 12 week online program. After much deliberation about whether or not I qualified as an "intermediate lifter," I asked Drake to message for more information and eventually ended up signing up. I was nervous and a bit apprehensive. This would be the first time someone other than my husband programmed my workouts!


This new program also bumped my workouts from 3x per week to 4x, which was a huge adjustment for me. One additional day doesn't sound like much, but it's another thing to fit in with my full time work schedule and extra curricular activities. The program also strongly recommended working out at a gym for access to certain equipment. Even though Drake as been sneaking in more and more workout equipment (Hello, dip station), our basement space is limited and our ceilings are low. So it's not feasible for us to own all of the equipment Drake would like to have. In addition, although I felt confident working out at home in my basement by myself, I wasn't sure I could maintain that level of confidence next to random the dudes in the racks at the gym.


When the program began, I compromised by lifting 2 days at home and 2 days at a gym. A low budget gym during peak hours (e.g., after work) amidst a global pandemic is a special sort of hell. However, if you go early enough on a Saturday and Sunday morning, you have a pretty good chance at finding an available squat rack. You might be thinking, why don't you just go to a more expensive gym? Well, given the pretty great set up that we have at home, I'm not interested in paying huge fees for access to 2-3 pieces of equipment I only need a couple of times per week, so Fit4Less is good enough. Honestly, the early morning gym sessions have added some nice structure to our weekends. It does mean we have to be more conscious of how late we stay up, but going to bed earlier and maintaining good sleep hygiene is also a good thing. (Yes, I am approximately 90 years old).


Each week of the 12 week beta testing program, the coaches sent out an updated workout plan. The workouts alternated lower body and upper body movements and each took me between 40-60 minutes to complete. The workouts remained the same each week with the number of sets/reps of each exercise varying. As the weeks progressed, we did fewer reps/sets, but heavier weight. This structure gave me lots of time to feel comfortable with the movements and work towards proper form. We got access to a private Facebook group where we could ask questions and post videos of our form for feedback. It felt pretty nervy to video myself doing a new exercise and then post it online for strangers to see, but it was good learning and everyone was very supportive! Many of the women had similar questions or experiences. At the end of the 12 weeks, my gym confidence had increased immensely. I'm lifting heavier than I ever have, learning new exercises, practicing my form, and feeling great! After finishing the first 12 weeks, I immediately signed up for another round of the program.


You might be thinking she talks about lifting heavy stuff, but what about cardio? My goals are to feel strong and to like the way I look naked. In other words, my primary focus is on building muscle and gaining strength, which I will achieve through lifting. Don't get me wrong, I'm not shitting on cardio. Cardio is great for you! It's good for heart health, stamina, mood, and fat loss... but it doesn't help you build muscle. I do try to fit in cardio between lift days, but I really don't enjoy it unless it's functional. I tend to do more cardio in the warmer months (e.g., biking to work or going for runs with the dogs and Drake). In the winter, I just force myself onto our treadmill periodically (which is less often that I'd care to admit).


When I first started lifting in the gym, I required Drake to stay near me at all times. He pointed me in the direction of equipment, helped me set things up, and supervised my form. (Such a supportive spouse!) I wasn't confident enough to do much by myself. If left to my own devices, I would have just hopped on a treadmill and ran until he finished his workout. This round of my lifting program features slightly different exercises than the previous round. Although I'm much more confident in the gym as a whole, those old insecure feelings do pop up, especially when I'm learning new exercises. I'm only 3 weeks into this round of the program, and I'm watching form videos from my coaches, Googling how to use certain machines, and occasionally having Drake double check my work. Gyms can be incredibly intimidating!


However, intimidating doesn't mean inaccessible. Anyone can learn to lift and there are tons of positive benefits for doing so.


Here's how to set your self up for success:

Have a Workout Plan. In order to have a successful workout, it's best to know what type of workout you want to do BEFORE you go. Common workouts alternate focusing on legs/lower body vs. arms/upper body or pushing exercises vs. pulling ones. Having a plan prevents you from wandering around the gym awkwardly and inevitably ending up just doing cardio. I can't help you plan your workout, but there are tons of knowledgeable people that can. If you already go to a gym, ask about training options or classes. You can also check out these accounts for inspiration:

Note: each personal trainer/fitness coach has their own area of expertise and focus. Not every coach/trainer is going to be the right fit for you. If what they say doesn’t resonate with you, find someone who does. (That being said, if absolutely no one resonates with you, you might need to learn more about health and fitness or adjust your goals).


Track Your Workouts. Keep track of what exercises you did and how much weight you used. This will prevent you from having to figure it out again each time you workout. (and trying every dumbbell on the rack). A notebook works just fine for this; however, Drake and I use the Perseus: Workout Gym Log to plan and track workouts. This app is free and has built in rest periods between sets (which is important!).


Like Your Workout Gear. It absolutely does not matter what you wear to workout in as long as you meet your facility’s dress code (which is usually pants, shirt, and shoes.) I’ve seen people that lift crazy heavy weights wearing jeans and a hoody. However, if you’re constantly going to be adjusting your pants or pulling on your bra every 10 seconds, find ones that fit better. If you like your gym gear and are comfortable in it, you’ll feel much more confident.


Consider Noise Cancelling Headphones. One of the best gym investments I have made is a pair of wireless over-the-ear noise canceling headphones. I scored these Skull Candy ones for $150 at the Source (Yes, the Source is still a physical storefront. Who knew, right?). You could certainly use your phone earbuds or whatever you have, but the over-the-ear headphones send a strong f$%k off vibe to anyone that might approach me wanting to chat. I am not at the gym to chat, I'm there to lift, sweat, and leave.


Listen to Something Motivating. This goes hand in hand with good headphones. Whether you listen to pump up jams or podcasts doesn’t matter, find something that gets you motivated enough to stay for your whole workout. If I don't have something to listen to, I'm ready to end my workout the minute I started it. A good playlist or podcast distracts me and I enjoy my workout significantly more. I tend to rotate between three custom Spotify playlists depending on my mood. You're welcome to listen to them!

  • 90's Workout - Basically Dance Mix '96 (e.g., Marky Mark, Vengaboys, Whigfield)

  • Just Pick It Up - Songs with heavy bass (e.g., Volbeat, AWOL nation, USS, Monowhales)

  • Throwback - 2000's punk rock (e.g., Sum 41, Gob, Jimmy Eat World).

Remember That Nobody is Watching You. I mean someone might be watching you, there are a few weirdos out there. But for the most part even though it feels like everyone is looking at you and judging, they’re not. This is called the “spotlight effect:" when we overestimate how much other people notice us. Do I check out other people at the gym? Absolutely. I might watch someone do an exercise I've never seen before. I might check out someone's well defined muscles and give them an internal clap. I might notice the color of someone's t-shirt or shoes. I might do these things for a few seconds, then I get back to focusing on my own workout. Could I tell you how long they were at the gym or pick them out in a line up later? Definitely not. There's absolutely no room for judgement at the gym. Everyone is there to be better than they were the day before. Not everyone does the same exercises. Not everyone has perfect form. Be patient and kind with yourself and others.


Clean up After Yourself! Okay, I lied. The one and only time you are allowed to judge another human being at the gym, is if they leave things messy. Gyms are community spaces that only function well when people are considerate. ALWAYS put your weights and equipment away after you are done using them. Proper gym etiquette also involves wiping equipment down with the spray/wipes provided after you have used them. You should totally sweat at the gym. There’s no shame in that. But don’t make other people lay/sit/stand in your mess. That’s gross.


This is by no means an exhaustive list, but I hope it inspires you to try. Anyone can learn to lift. You just have to pick it up. You can do hard things (and lift heavy ones!)


For your enjoyment (and mine), here are some awkward workout pics! (Yes, I keep my mask on at the gym. I'm a healthcare worker in a pandemic).


Best,


Laura

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